I see a trend especially in the poly and kink communities of relationships lasting through that new and getting to know you phase and then slowing dying.
Many don’t make it to that year mark. That somehow get past the 4 to 6 month mark but can’t make it further.
Sometimes there is a good reason for this. We are more aware of our needs and realize that the relationship doesn’t serve us but we should be figuring that out a lot sooner.
I think some have an idea that people can be thrown out. That it is easy just to ghost or say this is not working for me anymore and leave.
Where you see people succeed is when they look at their partner as their anchor. They see all of them in their most human sense. They do not look at them as a means to fulfill a need. They fall in love with the person.
They also have an attitude where they see the relationship as permanent. They see the person as their person and they want to make it work. So they make it work. They do what they need to do to learn and grow and keep that person in their life.
No excuses just love.
Lisa Gray 