I am in tears right now. I don’t know really how to feel. I just read something that blew me away. That is not unusual when you read something that is just good writing.
But you read it, and you think it could be about you. And there are feelings that come through in the writing that you want so much to believe that you are deserving of. But you can’t know for sure. You have been hurt so many times, why would it be about you? Why would you be seen as a goddess and worthy of that hunger and adoration?
And if they really felt that way, why would they hide it? Why would they want to give it up?
When I was a girl, I often dreamed about having a song written for me. Having someone feel strongly enough for me that they had to get it out in such a creative way. It was more than that, though, and I didn’t understand it then. It was so the world could see I was worthy of such devotion.
I truly wish that I did not have so much baggage. I understand it. I see my brain as it turns over every naunce of a thing to make sure I have it right and can see it from all sides.
One day I will find those feelings and see them and they will be enough.
Lisa Gray 