(another piece of something I am working on)
Once my blindfold and gag were taken off, I saw the small space in front of me. Just enough room for a wrought iron bed and a cabinet. He opened up that cabinet to take out some of my favorite accessories. He smiled as I bit my lip when the collar came out.
“I know, Baby. This is what you want, isn’t it? We are not going to put it on just yet. This is something you will earn.”
Fuck. I really want to earn it, but he is right. It is not meant for me now. It would have no meaning today. We haven’t done anything to develop that kind of bond. We have barely even met. I know some people think it is just a piece of jewelry, but a collar means more to me than that. It is not about submitting in the moment. It is not just about having his protection while you are at an event. Those things are nice and important, but it means more to me. It is more than a commitment of a ring, although some people look to it for that, too.
A collar tells me I am worthy of being his. I have proven myself in ways that show him I belong to him and I am his completely.
That moment ahead is in both of our minds right now. We know it is not the time, but it is nice to think about it, think about that meaning behind it. I watch him put the collar away.
I love the anticipation of it, but it brings me a calm peace instead of excitement and nervousness. It is like an inevitable conclusion to this thing he started. We both know what lies ahead. I am not afraid of it. I may be afraid of this moment and what is to come right now, but I am not afraid of the future and what will come of Us.
I think we are both sitting here with that hunger and craving for something. I know he has a plan. I can sense a promise in this silence that developed once the collar was put away: that this is only the beginning, and there is so much more yet to come before it comes out again to stay.
Lisa Gray 