Drawn to It

Sometimes I do not understand why I am drawn to that darkness, drawn to those predators, those sadists, those wolves in sheep’s clothing.

Over the years, I have seen others like me get close to someone and see them slowly turn into who they really are. We sometimes want it. We beg for them to show their true self. Let us see their darkness.

Then when they reveal everything, we run. We cry. We shout to the world and anyone who wants to hear that this is not a good person. This is someone dangerous. This is a Predator with a capital P. We do our best to warn others away from the person and away from those like them.

Then we start the cycle again. We look for those with certain traits. We want to walk that line. We think we will eventually find that special someone who we can love and accept for all that they are. We can look at them through rose-colored glasses. We can see that darkness, but ignore the darkest center and play along the edges.

They can show us the darkness that matches ours and hide just enough for us to stay in the pool where fear and safety mix.