Fantasies

Another day, another hair band.

When I was younger, I wanted to be a solid gold dancer. After that, in junior high when we had to explore careers, I was seriously thinking video music producer. These were the days when MTV was playing mostly videos and the game show, Remote Control. They would much later dip into reality TV and my fantasy of being a camera man on the real world and hiding my pregnancy with Lars Ulrich’s baby began. That is a whole story I am not getting into, but just know drummers were a thing for me back in the day.

We all have different fantasies that do not work out. It is still fun to fantasize as long as we recognize when our fantasies are not just silly but can be problematic, like your fantasy of flashing people in the supermarket or having sex on a crowded beach. You are thinking about doing something where you can get caught and people that do not have a choice, cannot consent to what they see. That is not kink shaming. That is a consent violation. It doesn’t hurt to fantasize, but I would never actually want to do anything to hurt someone else in that way. This is why I have crafted my hard limits in such a way that it is clear that I will not do it.